Learning to Share - Conflict Resolution for Parents and Childcare Providers

If your child is in daycare, it's likely that you'll eventuallypossible, choose a time whenyou and your provider
disagree with somethingyour childcare provider doescan talk without distractions. Don't talk in the doorway
or says. Recognizing when to say something, andwithyour child tugging at your leg or when your
howto approach the subject with your provider, willprovider is trying to manage 6 toddlers.
help maintain a positive relationshipbetween you andAllowing you both to focus on the conversation will
your childcare provider and a healthy environment forhelp you hear what each other issaying and really
your child.understand each other.
The best way to resolve a conflict is to never let itExplain your concern in simple terms, but do not
happen in the first place. Makesure you communicateaccuse or blame your provider.
with your childcare provider, letting them knowUse statements like, "I have a concern about how
yourexpectations about the care you want your childmuch television Mike is watching",instead of, "You are
to receive. If there are things thatyou absolutely wantletting Mike watch too much television". Both
a certain way, like your child not watching anystatements givethe same message, but the delivery
television oreating sweets, make sure you discussstyle of the first one is less accusing and willhelp foster
them in the initial interview. It's alsoimportant toa better discussion. You are both invested in the care
understand that parents and providers can haveof your child, andbeing able to discuss any issues
different viewsregarding appropriate ways to raise arationally and openly will help your child receivequality
child. Understanding that your provider maynot docare. Discuss the behavior that concerned you, why it
things exactly as you would, but that your child is stillconcerned you, andwhat you would like done to
receiving quality care,is vital in preventing conflict.correct the situation. Listen carefully to your providerso
Despite the best communication, you still may disagreeshe can explain her thoughts on the situation. There
with something yourchildcare provider does whilemay be safety or logisticsreasons why your provider
caring for your child. Try to say something as soonis doing something a certain way.
asyou notice an issue. The longer you let an issue go,Once you have discussed the issue, restate the
the more chance there is for itto grow into somethingsolution that you both agreed on.
bigger. Also, the sooner you address the issue, theThat way, you can make sure you both understand
sooneryou can resolve it and clear the air in yourwhat the next steps are and howthe issue is going to
relationship. Not addressing the problemright awaybe resolved. A question like, "Do you feel comfortable
could create enough stress with your provider that youwith thesolution we decided on", is a good way to
are not able torepair the relationship and may need tomake sure you both are on the samepage, and gives
find a new provider.your provider the chance to say if something is still
Ask your provider for a time to discuss the issue. Ifbothering her.